Koan 6
by Linda Carson
from Suffragette Koans
copyright Linda Carson 1993
| | Lights up. Three women. RUE is riding a stationary bicycle. |
|
| CICELY |
| Good morning. |
|
RUE |
| Good morning. |
|
MELISSA |
| Lovely day for a ride. |
|
CICELY |
| I've heard a girl can do herself an injury on a bicycle. |
|
| RUE |
| How so? |
|
| CICELY |
| You'll lose your virginity. |
|
| RUE |
| Oh, not if you're careful. I keep my virginity in a
locket, you see, hung from a chain about my waist.
When I bicycle I simply shorten the chain so I don't
sit on the locket and break it. |
|
| | RUE draws a chain and locket out from under her skirt. |
|
| CICELY |
| Do you seal it somehow? I lock my virginity into this
little box. |
|
| | CICELY draws a small locked
box on a ribbon from under her skirt. |
|
| I keep the key in my glove. Should my skirt come up
for any reason, there's no danger of my virginity
slipping away by accident. |
|
| | MELISSA draws a string and a
tiny bottle sealed with wax from under her skirt. |
|
| RUE |
| Your string is frayed. |
|
| CICELY |
| And knotted. |
|
| MELISSA |
| A number of times I've feared my virginity was lost,
but it's always been safely returned to me. |
|
| CICELY |
| The bicycle—is it... exciting? |
|
| RUE |
| It's not so nice as horseback riding but the
pedalling...well, it's better being actively involved,
somehow. |
|
| MELISSA |
| May I try? |
|
| | RUE dismounts. MELISSA climbs
onto the bicycle while RUE holds it steady. |
|
| RUE |
| Watch your skirt on the chain. |
|
| MELISSA |
| My heavens! Hold on. It doesn't stand up by itself! |
|
| RUE |
| That's the trick to it. |
|
| MELISSA |
| I'm getting the hang of it. Oh no, blast it all, where
did my virginity go? |
|
| RUE |
| Keep steering! |
|
| CICELY |
| Here it is, it's just swung 'round to the back with all
the pedalling. |
|
| MELISSA |
| Well, then, this is all right. This is splendid. |
|
| RUE |
| I don't believe the bicycle itself is the threat to
one's virginity. It's not the saddle or the cross-bar
or any such equipment that does the damage. It's that
a bicycle carries you so many places where such a small
thing might be lost. |
|
| CICELY |
| I've actually taken to leaving my virginity at home
when I go out. |
|
| RUE |
| Where do you keep it? |
|
| CICELY |
| In my dainties drawer, or wrapped in tissue in the toe
of a slipper. |
|
| MELISSA |
| If you sleep with your virginity under your pillow,
you'll dream of the man you'll marry. |
|
| CICELY |
| What makes you believe in that? |
|
| MELISSA |
| Albert Jeffries. |
| CICELY |
| I don't know any Alberts personally. |
| MELISSA |
| Neither do I, which is why I put any stock in the dream
at all. I'd certainly never marry any of the gentlemen
I know. They're all in such a blasted hurry to return my virginity. |
|
| | Aside to RUE: |
| How do I stop? |
|
| RUE |
| Pedal backwards. |
|
| | MELISSA stops pedalling,
dismounts, and holds the bicycle steady. |
|
| MELISSA |
| Here, let Cicely try. |
|
| CICELY |
| Oh, I couldn't. |
|
| MELISSA |
| I rather enjoyed it. |
|
| CICELY |
| Hold my virginity, then. No point taking any chances. |
|
| | CICELY unties her virginity,
pulls a tiny key out of her glove and passes them to RUE
and MELISSA. |
|
| And the key. One's no good without the other. |
|
| | CICELY mounts the bicycle. |
| Oh, you're right. It wobbles! Don't let me fall! |
|
| MELISSA |
| Pedal harder. When you go faster it's easier to keep
it up. |
|
| CICELY |
| I'm pedalling as hard as a lady ought. |
|
| | MELISSA pushes the bicycle
harder from behind. CICELY experiences an unexpected sensation. |
|
| Oh. Oh my. |
|
| | CICELY stops abruptly and dismounts. |
|
| That's enough of that. |
|
| Who did I leave my virginity with? Melissa? Rue?
Give it back now. |
|
| | RUE tosses the box to MELISSA. |
|
| This isn't very funny. Give it back. |
|
| | MELISSA tosses the box back to
RUE, evading CICELY's grasp. Instead, CICELY grabs MELISSA's virginity. The
conveniently frayed cord snaps and CICELY captures the sealed bottle. |
|
| Now who's laughing? |
|
| | Pause. MELISSA returns the
box to CICELY. Pause. RUE returns the key. CICELY tucks
the key into her glove, and secures the box at her waist
beneath her skirt again. |
|
| | Pause. |
|
| MELISSA |
| Cicely? |
|
| | MELISSA extends her hand for
the bottle. Pause. CICELY giggles, then pops the bottle
into her mouth and smiles. |
|
| Cicely! |
|
| | CICELY blows MELISSA a kiss.
CICELY skips around MELISSA,
humming, and twirls the strings that hang from her mouth. |
|
| | Suddenly, RUE grabs CICELY
from behind and holds her arms. MELISSA tries to
retrieve the bottle. CICELY, still giggling, snaps her
teeth. MELISSA pulls CICELY's head back by her hair and
pries the bottle out slowly from between CICELY's teeth. |
|
| Thanks, Rue. I've got it. |
|
| | RUE releases CICELY. CICELY
steps away. |
|
| I think I've got it. |
|
| CICELY |
| Oh, no. |
|
| | With wide eyes, CICELY slowly
opens her mouth and extends her tongue to reveal the cork.
RUE takes it from CICELY's tongue. |
|
| MELISSA |
| The cork. |
|
| | MELISSA, RUE and CICELY go
wide-eyed with shock. MELISSA shields the bottle with her
hand, and looks inside it. |
|
| RUE |
| Melissa? What's in it? |
|
| | MELISSA does not turn back or reply. |
|
| | RUE quickly pulls her locket
from under her skirt, turns aside, and pries it open. |
|
| CICELY |
| Melissa? What's in yours, Rue? |
| | RUE turns back briefly to
CICELY, wordless, and then away. |
|
| | CICELY looks to MELISSA, and
then to RUE. CICELY takes the key out of her glove, hauls
her skirt up in front, jams it into her waistband, and grabs
the little box. Pause. |
|
| | CICELY drops the box and
swallows the key. She turns the bicycle to face downstage,
mounts it and "rides away" pedalling madly. |
|
| | Lights down.
|