Lights up on Kath hanging clothes on a line and "la- la"-ing her way through the friendly giant theme song. they are outfits representing the four characters in the story. she will stand behind the appropriate clothes to deliver lines. Or Kath can tell the story to three well-worn teddy bears, using a Barbie or other glamour doll for the role of Goldilocks.
Kath: Once upon a time
there was a beautiful girl
with big
blue
eyes
and silky golden curls
and her name was Goldilocks.
One day
when Goldilocks was walking through the woods
she broke into a private home
just for the heck of it.
(AS GOLDILOCKS:)
"Won't this be a giggle!"
She committed assorted acts of vandalism
and then,
plumb tuckered out from all that fun,
she curled up prettily on one of the beds,
hiked up her skirt to show off her taut sinuous thighs
and fell fast asleep.
When the bears
who lived there
came home from their morning constitutional,
they found their home a shambles.
(AS PAPA BEAR:)
"Someone's been sitting in my chair!"
(AS MAMA BEAR:)
"Someone's stuck fingers in my porridge!"
(AS BABY BEAR:)
"Come quick, Papa, she's getting girl fleas in my bed!"
(AS GOLDILOCKS:)
"Oops, I must have drifted off,"
said Goldilocks,
stretching to show off her pert bosom to best advantage.
(AS GOLDILOCKS:)
"I must look a mess!"
Papa Bear looked at her golden curls, long legs and coy
pose, then ripped her head off with one swipe of his paw.
He patted Mama Bear on her big furry rump and said,
(AS PAPA BEAR:)
"I'll clean that up after breakfast, dear."
(AS MAMA BEAR:)
"Son, don't you touch that. You don't know where it's
been!"
(KATH STARTS TAKING DOWN THE LAUNDRY.)
The moral of the story is that sex appeal only appeals
to people who'd like to screw you.
(KATH HUMS THE FRIENDLY GIANT THEME AS THE LIGHTS [AND
THE LAST OF THE LAUNDRY] COME DOWN.)